Halloween is THE best holiday. Why? Because you get to play dress-up like a child, eat boatloads of candy, and get drunk with your friends on a weeknight sans judgment. Holidays without heartwarming undertones practically require debauchery. Hence, the affinity my peers and I have for Halloween.
One great thing about Halloween, besides it being a major flashback to our sunshiny childhoods, is it isn’t all mushy, gushy and family-oriented. Thanksgiving and Christmas are “warm ‘n fuzzy” holidays. Valentine’s Day is for people in love (or
bitter single folks who celebrate the 14th ironically). The Fourth celebrates Amurrrica with fire in the sky. Easter is overly religious – and let’s be honest, the whole pastel and bunny thing is borderline creepy. But Halloween? Halloween is a whole other ballgame, folks.
It may seem silly considering most millennials are on a super tight budget, but when it comes to things like brunches and holiday décor — things we deem absolutely necessary for life happiness — we go ALL out.
Our obsession with Halloween is the reason why millennials, more than other demographics, are willing to splurge on mountains of decorations and celebratory swag. You may not be able to pay your cable bill this month, but you sure as hell can shell out $300 for an authentic Game of Thrones character costume.
And all you 29-year-olds can grumble away about how you’re getting too old for this shit, but you can’t just NOT get into the spirit of Halloween. It’s your young-person duty to participate in October 31st festivities. You’re basically surrendering to old age if you fail to purchase at least one glitter pumpkin, string of twinkly lights, or faux spiderweb.
Halloween also affords revelers the opportunity to indulge their escapist fantasies.
When you spend 90% of your week stuffed into a dingy cubical that smells like old baloney and your coworker’s burnt popcorn, most days it feels like the weekend can’t come soon enough. Halloween takes it one step further. It’s more than a weekend — It lets us distance ourselves from our shitty lives and be whomever we want, whilst collecting ungodly amounts of sugary treats.
Speaking of sugar… Halloween means you can buy jumbo bags of candy in August and justify it as a legitimate trick-or-treating purchase.
“Oh, this enormous bag of sugar is obviously for the kids” you tell yourself as you snarf down your twelfth Reece’s of the hour.
Sugar, booze, ridiculous costumes? Yep, it’s the best day of the year!