You know you’re busy when you literally don’t have time to break up with your boyfriend.
No, not me.
A friend of mine who has been kind of so-so about her boyfriend for months, is too overwhelmed with work and travel and friends to give her beau the love and attention he deserves. Or really, love and attention at all.
On the outside, everything looks fine. They try to squeeze in a date night once a week, attend events together, and post the occasional PDA-filled photo on Facebook, but it’s never been the type of thing with long term potential and he’s not really worth scheduling her entire life around so…
The time has come to put this relationship to bed.
Except, it’s hard. Breakups are tiring and fraught with emotion. They require intense conversation and focus and maturity. When you’ve been a couple for any significant period of time, you can’t just brush someone aside and stop responding to calls and texts. The end of a relationship, though unpleasant, deserves dignity. You should “consciously uncouple” (thanks, Gwynnie) rather than simply let it dissolve before your very eyes.
But, like, who has time for that? Seriously. If you barely have the time and energy for the relationship itself, how are you supposed to find the inner strength and free hours to have “The Talk”?
So what’s a girl to do? Does she stick it out a little longer and wait for life to quiet down? Or just pull the plug and hope he walks away without turning it into an ordeal?
It’s not like he’s a bad guy. Being with him isn’t hurting anyone. Sure, maybe they’re wasting each other’s time a tad, but neither of them is in any rush to settle down or find “the one” or any of that. So does it make sense to just stay together and deal with it later?
I’m a big believer in ripping off the band-aid. Get it over with, I say. Wave goodbye. Be sad. Move on.
But as great as that sounds in theory, it’s actually pretty difficult in practice. As someone who’s been known to hang on WAY too long to underwhelming relationships, it’s hard for me to make a compelling case for the no-muss-no-fuss break up.
Regardless, I wish her luck. Dating is hard and breakups are the worst, but she’ll survive and at least her heart isn’t being pulverized in the process.